Episode 18 – How to find freedom from MOM GUILT

Mom guilt is REAL!

After nearly 2 decades of being a mom to both girls and boys, spanning 5 unique personalities, parenting through a divorce, and through a marriage saved from divorce, I have come to understand that, while I am no expert, I have some wisdom to impart on this subject. 

Today we are going to talk about the 3 different ways Mom Guilt manifests itself and how to find freedom from it before it drives you crazy!

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Episode Scripture

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Mathew 6:24 English Standard Version

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you

Psalm 53:6 English Standard Version

 But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load.

Galations 6:4-5 English Standard Version

For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.

Colossians 1:16-17 English Standard Version

Big Picture Take Away

No matter how much experience you had with kids before you have a baby every first-time mom has doubts about her ability and, at some point, fears that she is getting it all wrong. If God created you to be a mom, wouldn’t it be easier?

Mom guilt starts early and stems from fear of the unknown.

As babies become toddlers, moms become competitive. Mom guilt slowly starts to seep into your psyche as you begin to compare your child to others and start questioning his or her development based on your parenting

Mom guilt grows as your children grow and stems from comparison to other moms and their children.

You can train your children, guide your children, discipline your children, but you canNOT control your children. God gave them the same free will He gave you and they WILL use it despite your best attempts to stifle it.

Mom guilt wreaks havoc on you when it stems from control.

Practical Application

You will make hundreds of decisions every day as a mom and these decisions are a lot easier when you are walking with the Lord and trusting that His Word gives you the foundation for ALL of them. While there is no bible verse that explicitly details the age your daughter should pierce her ears or how old your son must be before he can ask that cute girl out on a date, the underlying principles are there. From modesty to marriage, respect to responsibility, God has laid the groundwork from which you can base these decisions through the Bible. When you stay in the word and study what it says about who God calls ALL Christians to be and raise your kids with that in mind, you are trusting in Him.

The guilt that came from comparing yourself to other moms and even yourself as a mom at a different time in your life isn’t worth it. God gave your kids an imperfect mom that is perfect for them. There is no other mom that they should have and when you accept that, you will be free from the Mom guilt that comes from comparison.

There is no formula that produces the best kid and you are not a bad mom because you can’t seem to figure one out. Trial and error is not a bad thing provided you seek wisdom from God and, as I already said, rely on His Word as the foundation for everything you try. But then, you must remember that God is ultimately in control of it all.

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See what God is doing with my mess daily as I share the trials and triumphs of being a mom, wife, and friend who is learning to let go of control and trust God to lead me while getting some laughs along the way!

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