As women, we may confuse “intimacy” with “intercourse” and want to avoid it for one reason or another. Or we confuse “intimacy” with “romance” and have unrealistic expectations of what it should look like.
But let me tell you a little secret I learned while God was redeeming my marriage just a few years ago – intimacy is way more than just flowers and sex.
Intimacy is the experience of really knowing someone and being known by them.
God designed us to stay connected with our husbands and it matters to your man more than you think.
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Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.James 4:8 English Standard Version
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.Philippians 4:8 English Standard Version
Big Picture Take Away
Nearness to God isn’t tangible but comes from a deep-seated trust in knowing that He is with you all the time through the Holy Spirit. You know God and know that He knows you.
Intimacy with God where you really know Him comes from pouring into your relationship through honest prayers that expose your heart in very raw and real ways. Through reading your Bible and listening to what God has to say in the scriptures rather then making the scriptures say what you want to hear. Through accountability in your life that you welcome because you want to experience spiritual growth, not stifle it.
We must do the work, but it is worth the reward! The same is true in our marriages.
5 practical Ways Every Wife Can Be INTIMATE with Her Husband
- At least once a month cook his favorite dinner, or make his favorite dessert. Not into cooking or baking, no problem. Stack the pantry/fridge with his favorite snacks.
- Ask how HIS day was, compliment HIS outfit, offer to watch HIS show, give HIM a backrub…without expecting him to return the favor.
- Send a text message out of the blue – thank him, pray for him, or just send him a funny meme.
- FLIRT with him – even if you flirt badly, the idea is to reconnect so be silly if you are not good at being sexy.
- Have sex with your husband! God created this act as an incredible opportunity for a husband and wife to connect both physically and emotionally.
Need More Help?
Need a little help heating things up in the bedroom? Check out Dr. Jennifer Degler’s Fan the Flame series!
Is your marriage suffering because of pornography? Read this article from Covenant Eyes about how to talk to your husband. Another great resource to learn about and understand this addiction is Focus on the Family.
*If your husband is receptive to getting help, encourage him to reach out to a trusted pastor, counselor, or male friend. While you can be a part of his recovery, you cannot be his sole source of accountability. It will not help your marriage! If he is too embarrassed to seek outside help at first, ask him if he will watch this free video series Discovering God’s Freedom From Pornography
Discover the power of writing out the scriptures and prayers.
This 6-week study was designed for the busy woman who wants to spend time with God but just needs a little help.
It was designed for you!
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Every Tuesday, I post a “tip” on how to do marriage, parenting, or managing your home to the glory of God. And every Wednesday we dive into the Bible, pull out a passage, and glean its wisdom.
Plus, you can see what God is doing with my mess daily as I share the trials and triumphs of being a mom, wife, and friend who is learning to let go of control and trust God to lead me while getting some laughs along the way!